Acknowledging the Tough Seasons

“I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” John 16:33

I was recently taking a walk and I ran into a neighbor who I hadn’t seen in a while. We live down the street from each other, but rarely get to talk, We usually wave as we pass each other in the road. I love to talk to her. She’s always laughing, always has funny stories and always has encouraging words.

I stopped in front of her house and we started getting caught up on each other’s lives. Her kids are a little older that mine. One is in college and one recently got married. I was chattering on about my summer and she was telling me some funny stories about hers.

Then she told me that her daughter had suffered a miscarriage. She was going to be fine, but was really disappointed. It was fairly early, but they had seen the heartbeat. My neighbor was thankful that she could be with her. They would try again soon. A little later in the conversation, she told me that her son’s dog had run away on the same day that they were scheduled to be out of town for a wedding and also on the same day that he was scheduled to be a pall bearer at the funeral of a friend who had died suddenly and tragically.

But, she was happy to report that they did find the dog. I stopped her at this point and said to her, “You had a terrible summer.”

She took a breath and acted a little surprised at my words and admitted that, yes, it had been a rough summer for them. I told her how sorry I was to hear it and that I would keep her family in my prayers and she thanked me.

We chatted a little longer and said our goodbyes. I thought about what a tough season she had been through and how she wasn’t complaining at all, but just telling her story. I thought about how important that it was for her to be able to tell it honestly. But, perhaps most importantly, that she could acknowledge, and have someone else acknowledge her tough season.

I think that many of us believe that to be good Christians, we are supposed to smile through the pain, no matter what and just count our blessings, because we have so many. Sometimes we can be guilty of telling others to do the same. Being a glass half-full kind of gal, I always attempt to look for the blessings in my own life.

But, sometimes, there are valleys. Sometimes we suffer through rough seasons. In those seasons, we should remember that it’s okay to acknowledge our pain and disappointment. It’s okay to share it with others and it’s okay to cry out to God, remembering that we never walk alone and the season will eventually pass.

A conversation with a neighbor reminded me. Perhaps you needed reminding too.

Have an awesome day!

Wendy 🙂

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Trusting the Builder

Someone with skill can create beauty out of what seems like chaos to the casual observer.

After combing the internet for several weeks, looking for end tables for my daughter’s college apartment, and not finding what I was looking for, I went to my hubby and asked him if he could make her some. He asked me what I had in mind. I showed him a couple of pictures and he told me that he would be happy to make them.

We went to Lowe’s and gathered the materials. Now, I can spend plenty of time in that store, looking for everything from plants to light fixtures, but I tend to get bored when we are buying building supplies. I love to paint the finished product, but I’m terrible in the planning process and truthfully, in the building process too.

We wandered through Lowe’s, and he looked for a type of screw I had never heard of and a special bit for his router and some wood to trim them out. While I wasn’t super interested in what we were looking for, I trusted that these items were important because he’s the builder and I am not.

When we got home, sure enough, there was an important use for all of those items and he made the tables I described to him, just beautifully.

Later that evening, I found myself reflecting on how often we ask God to give us something. Sometimes, He starts building our dreams and we aren’t even paying attention. He puts together all kinds of abstract pieces, using our experiences and circumstances like little nuts and bolts.

We often don’t understand the why He does what He is doing, like I had no idea why my hubby was buying the items he was buying at Lowe’s, but do we trust that the end there will be something beautiful and useful?

If I’m honest, I often find myself frustrated in the building process. I want to hurry up and get to the finished product, so I can decorate and use it right away. I sometimes forget that building something important always takes time.

My hubby’s tables reminded me the importance of planning and that patience is so very important, when it comes to building. All that time consuming measuring and waiting is for a reason. In the end, we have to make the intentional decision to trust the Builder.

Sometimes I need reminding. Perhaps you needed reminding too.

Have an awesome day!

Wendy 🙂

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Crowded Closet Lessons

When we keep our hearts and souls uncluttered, we are open to all kinds of beauty on our journey.

I was taking a walk a few weeks ago and ran into a neighbor who I hadn’t talked to in a while. We were talking about our kids and our summer. I told her I had been refinishing furniture all summer. When she asked me where I got it from, I told her my parents had a barn full of stuff no one wanted and that we had a few pieces stashed in our own storage, that needed to be used.

She laughed and said that at least I hadn’t put it all in my closet. She went on to say that after her mother-in-law passed away that they didn’t know what to do with a lot of her things, so she just kept putting sticking things in her closet. She confided that her closet had already been a mess with things crammed everywhere, but all of the extra items actually collapsed her floor.

I thought she was joking at first, but she wasn’t. She had to get a contractor to come in and rebuild her floor. She laughed and said the entire incident was incredibly embarrassing, but that now her closet was so uncluttered and organized that we could probably eat dinner there if we wanted.

I thought about my neighbor’s closet long after our conversation ended. I couldn’t quite wrap my brain around having that much stuff in my closet, but as I looked around my own closet, there were things in there I hadn’t worn in years. Why was I holding on to that stuff?

I also thought about the things we keep piling into our hearts and souls that do nothing, but create clutter and weight. Things like old hurts that we refuse to let go of, anger at people or situations that have long since passed, all kinds of fear ranging from getting hurt to failing, or anxiety about circumstances that we just can’t change, can fill us up completely.

Like the old bride’s maid dresses hanging in my closet, those emotions probably were needed at some point. But now, at best, all of the heart and soul clutter causes unnecessary crowding that takes up space that should be for the good stuff, like hope, trust and love. At worst, it can get so heavy to carry around, it can collapse us completely, like my neighbor’s closet.

My neighbor’s story inspired me to go home and go through my own closet and weed out what I no longer need, items that once served a purpose, but don’t any longer. Her story also inspired me to do a heart and soul check and rid myself of unneeded baggage there as well.

I was reminded that there’s freedom that comes from traveling light. Perhaps you needed reminding too.

Have an awesome day!

Wendy 🙂

Categories: Building Christian Character, Trusting God | 1 Comment

Keeping an Open Heart

Living with an open heart, leads us to limitless possibilities.

My son is not a fan of the ocean. He’s a self-proclaimed mountain man. Much to his dismay, my family usually takes a trip to he beach every summer. He grumbles. He spends as little time as possible on the beach and is always looking for some activity that doesn’t involve swimming in the ocean.

I suspect his feelings stem from a trip to the Atlantic Ocean in Florida, when he was younger. The waves were fairly high and he was playing on a wave rider. At some point, he was knocked off of his board and his face was scraped up on the bottom. It wasn’t a serious injury by any means, but enough to make him leery of the ocean.

Our next few beach trips were also on the Atlantic side of Florida, and he liked the ocean less and less. The Atlantic is often not very clear and there was a time or two, when people around us said they saw sting rays. We even saw a few jelly fish on the sand, both sea creatures, that can sting.

Last summer, we went to the Gulf of Mexico. The water there was very calm and clear. When we were driving down, he announced that he would not be getting into the ocean. I assured him that this ocean was different than the Atlantic was. I don’t think he believed me.

All he knew was what he had experienced personally, and he was not impressed.

When we finally walked to the beach the first time, he saw the difference. It wasn’t long before he got into the crystal clear, calm, water, where we could actually see our feet. His opinion of the ocean changed.

I was reminded of how, like my son, we often judge everything, by our limited experiences. If we have a bad break up or two, we decide that all of the opposite sex are bad. If we were involved in an unhappy marriage, we believe all marriages lead to misery. If we have been hurt in a friendship, we can avoid forming close relationships, because we feel we can never trust anyone.

And then there’s church, if we have been involved in a church where God is not in the driver’s seat and people are looking out for their own interests and not Kingdom interests, we can become disillusioned and decide that all churches are bad too.

Of course, all of those scenarios are false.

All aspects of our lives are a bit like the ocean. From relationships, to jobs, to church. All of them have the possibility of having high waves or dangerous sea life. Sharks are everywhere.

But, there are many of those scenarios that are beautiful, calm and clear as well. Strong friendships are an amazing blessing and the comfort and security of a good marriage, is priceless. A solid, loving church, can be an unshakable foundation for road weary travelers on this side of Eternity.

My son’s ocean conversion reminded me to be careful not to judge the world around us through the lens of our limited experiences. When we judge all, based on just a few, we may miss out on something incredible. Perhaps you needed reminding too.

Have an awesome day!

Wendy 🙂

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Trusting the Caller

The man selling peanuts wasn’t there to assist swimmers, but when he was called to, he did.

Last summer, when my family was on vacation, there was a guy who came by in a tiny boat, selling boiled peanuts and drinks, to the snorkelers and the people on the beach. I had never seen anything like it before, but I thought his entrepreneuarial spirit was amazing.

People would line up in the water, to buy snacks.

One day, there were two little girls on a float, that had ventured out a little too far and they seemed to be struggling. He motored over to them and somehow pulled them into his tiny boat, to safety. He then, took them to the shore and delivered them to their grateful parents.

He motored back out a little ways and a lifeguard came over on a jet ski, from the other side of the beach, and scolded him. I couldn’t hear the conversation, but I could tell the lifeguard wasn’t happy. The peanut boat captain, sat politely, then shrugged his shoulders and went back to selling peanuts.

The entire scenario didn’t last more than a few minutes, but stayed on my mind long after we left the beach. I was shocked. That guy had just rescued two little girls. Was that lifeguard seriously trying to get into some bizarre turf war? I’m sure those parents would have loved to have had their say in the matter.

We have all been at one time or another, thrown into a situation that we didn’t feel equipped for, but felt called to do. The Bible is full of those people, from Moses the stutterer, to Ester the reluctant queen, to Mary, the virgin, who would give birth to our savior.

God often chooses to call people who seem very ill equipped for the task He has in front of them. It’s how faith is built. When we are called to do something bigger than we are, then we are forced to attribute our success to His strength, not our own. We end up seeing first hand, that nothing is impossible with God.

But, the Bible also teaches us that there will be opposition when we are following God’s plans. There will always be pharaohs and pharisees, like that lifeguard, who will attempt to tell us why we can’t or shouldn’t do what we are called to do, or to even convince us that it’s not our job.

And just like, Moses, Ester, Mary, and the disciples, we must go forth anyway, even if it’s just one tiny fearful step at a time. Because in the end, when we are following God’s will, we will be at the right place at the right time and we will have exactly what we need to succeed. Faith is about learning to trust the Caller.

A peanut boat rescue reminded me. Perhaps you needed reminding too.

Have an awesome day!

Wendy 🙂

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Finding the Blessings

Turns out, the ideal beach vacation, has very little to do with the weather.

Last summer, my family vacationed in Destin, Florida. It had been years since I had been to the Gulf of Mexico and I was super excited. Our past several beach trips were to the Atlantic side of Florida. They were all wonderful trips, but the white beaches and the clear water on the Gulf of Mexico, are hard to beat.

I couldn’t wait to spend hours and hours, sitting on the sand and listening to the waves. I literally counted the days until we could go. The beach and the water didn’t disappoint. It was as beautiful as I had hoped.

Unfortunately, the weather was not. It rained. I mean not like that normal Florida rain, where it rains an hour every afternoon and moves out. It rained for hours every single day, but one.

There was a time in my life when I would have been devastated and would have believed the vacation that I had been waiting for a year to go on, was ruined.

But, I’ve finally reached a point in my life, where I’ve come to understand that my happiness doesn’t come from the where I am, but from the who I’m with.

My hubby and I were blessed to have our older teenagers with us. I have no idea how many more vacations they will both be able to join us for. There will be things like internships, and jobs, and maybe even summer school, that will keep them busy.

We were able to squeeze out at least a few hours each day of beach time and it was enough.

When we were indoors, we watched movies together and even watched and played some game shows. We talked. We hung out in ways that we really don’t when we are at home.

We got to play putt-putt golf and race cars. We went to see “The Incredibles 2,” fourteen years after we saw the first one together.

When my kids were little, I might have considered the entire vacation a bust. When we have preconceived notions of what the “perfect” anything, looks like, we are bound to be disappointed and we can sometimes miss the blessings that God has placed right in front of us.

It’s not really possible to capture meaningful conversations and inside jokes on social media.

Maybe that’s by design. Maybe the moments that matter the most to us, will always be the ones that are the most personal and will have very little to do with the circumstances, and everything to do with the people we share them with.

A rainy beach trip reminded me. Perhaps you needed reminding too.

Have an awesome day!

Wendy 🙂

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Love Remains

“Three things will last forever-faith, hope, and love-and the greatest of these is love.” 1 Corinthians 13:13

As I write this post, Hurricane Florence is bearing down on North Carolina. It’s been a strange hurricane by all accounts. It has defied the odds of even coming ashore at all, based on the position it began in. It has weakened and then strengthened and was even predicted to strengthen to a record-breaking status, before once again weakening. It has literally danced up and down the East Coast and the focus of the eye has changed repeatedly.

Forecasters are reluctantly admitting that this particular hurricane is just dependent on too many variables to predict much of anything with much certainty.

I had some friends that once had to evacuate their homes on the coast of Georgia, for a hurricane with just a few hours notice. I remember the wife telling me that she looked around her home and asked herself, what they needed to try to save. It would have to fit in their car.

She said she chose their photo albums and their home computer, which was also their office computer. Once they got their child, some clothes and their dog in the car, there was very little space for anything else.

The hurricane shifted and missed them, but I have always remembered what she told me about leaving at a moment’s notice.

Those of us who are blessed enough to live in the modern western world, have all kinds of conveniences and lots of predictability. We usually know what weather is coming, a week or more in advance. We know what the traffic will be like before we even leave the house in the morning. We have a constant flow of answers to our questions at our fingertips. We have retirement plans and health insurance. We are planners and we are prepared.

But, sometimes life throws us curve balls that we couldn’t have possibly anticipated, no matter the amount of planning we engaged in. Sometimes tragedies like sickness, or a divorce, or job loss, or even a death can strike.

Hurricanes happen.

It’s not a matter of if, but of when. And when the storm comes, how can we prepare? If we walk in faith, we know that we never walk alone. We know that Jesus holds our hand, no matter the tragedy or the outcome and that foundation can never be destroyed. If we strive to put our family and friendships ahead of our material things, we have that protection as well.

Hurricane Florence has reminded me that life here on this side of Eternity will always be unpredictable. As we pause to pray for the safety of those in her wake, may we remember that the most important things in life are not things.

Have an awesome day!

Wendy 🙂

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Walking in Faith

When we walk with God, every little step we take in faith, matters.

Last Sunday, my Sunday school class was discussing Exodus 24, the building of the Ark of the Covenant and the tabernacle. It’s easy to get lost in the Old Testament sometimes, when we read things like specific directions that seem to drone on and on, about how to build something, using measurements that we aren’t familiar with, we want to just skip over it.

We tend to zone out when the language, or even the culture, or situation, is foreign to us, but in doing so, we can really miss out on some very interesting and inspiring information.

When we were reading the chapter aloud in class and it got to the part of what materials God wanted used to build the ark and the tabernacle, my mind snapped to attention. He wanted things like silver, gold, bronze, fine linen and dyed yarn.

Where would they have put their hands on that stuff? Didn’t they leave in the middle of the night, pursued across the Red Sea by the Egyptians? Wasn’t the story that their bread hadn’t even had time to rise, so they took it on the run? Did they have the time to pack this kind of stuff?

But, another verse popped into my head and I couldn’t wait to look it up. In Exodus 12:35, Moses instructed the Israelites to go to their Egyptian neighbors and ask for those things and they complied.

I wonder if they thought Moses was out of his mind. They had just lived through all of those plagues unscathed and Moses wanted them to go ask the ruined Egyptians, for their riches. But, they did.

The text says, “The Lord made the Egyptians favorably disposed towards the people, and they gave them what they asked for, so they plundered the Egyptians.” Exodus 12:36

Soon after, the plague that killed the firstborn sons of all of the Egyptians came and Pharaoh told them to go. So they went quickly, but they carried all of those riches.

It’s kind of a strange little story until you get to Chapter 25. God wanted those riches to build His ark and His tabernacle. He knew all along what was needed and how He would get it. All the Israelites were required to do was have faith and obedience.

And that’s all that’s required of us today. We worship the same God who knew exactly what He would use those riches for. He was at work then. He’s at work now. It sometimes may seem like He’s not and that we are required to do things that make no sense to us at the time.

The story of the building of the ark and tabernacle, reminds us that we don’t have to understand; we just have to trust and obey. Sometimes I need reminding. Perhaps you do too.

Have an awesome day!

Wendy 🙂

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The Scars are Part of the Beauty

At the time, I suspect someone was very unhappy with that spot. Now, it’s simply part of the table’s story.

Last weekend, I asked my hubby to drag our kitchen table out into the garage. It’s an old farmhouse table that was long overdue for some tlc. The table has a cool history. My hubby’s granddaddy built it for his growing family, back before my mother-in-law was even born.

That table has had countless meals served upon it and there’s no telling how many conversations. Over the years, there would have been discussions of the Great Depression by the folks sitting around it as well as talk of World War II and the Kennedy Assassination.

I’ve no doubt, that thousands of prayers have been lifted up in its presence.

My hubby and I have had that table for some 21 years now and our own family has added to its history, including the glitter that got in its cracks while my Mama was helping my children with some Christmas crafts.

Some years back, in an effort to preserve it, I put a coat of a water based sealer on it. Unfortunately, after years of wiping it down before and after dinner, the finish became sticky and napkins and any other type of paper would stick to it.

I tried a simple fix early last summer, of sanding it. It didn’t work, so I had to resort to more drastic measures. I had to actually strip it and sand it and then reseal it with an oil based product.

As I was working on the table over the weekend, I marveled at all of the nicks and scratches. There’s a dark black spot on it, that my hubby says was always there. I wouldn’t dream of trying to remove it. I’m not sure I could if I wanted to. For me, it along with all of the other scars, adds to the table’s story and beauty. It makes it unique.

But, I’ll bet my hubby’s grandmother was furious when it happened. I mean, it’s a huge black spot. She couldn’t have possibly known how long that table would be around or thought about the roll it would play in the lives of her great-grandchildren, who she would never even meet.

As I was coating the table with polyurethane, I thought about how we all have spots, and dings, and scars, like that table. They come from simply living.

Sometimes we try to deny them and hide them, and when we got them, we most likely could see no good coming from them. But those scars add to our beauty. They helped to shape who we are. They help us reach out to others along the way, who can benefit from our wisdom.

And who knows, some of those lessons learned, may actually filter down to our own great-grandchildren.

A beautiful old table reminded me to embrace who we are and where we’ve been, scars and all, and to remember that those scars and scratches come from living a long life. Not everyone gets that blessing. Perhaps you needed reminding today.

Have an awesome day!

Wendy 🙂

Categories: Building Christian Character, Choosing to See the Bright Side | 2 Comments

Respecting the Boundaries

“My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts,”says the Lord.”And my ways are far beyond anything you can imagine.” Isaiah 8

I grew up in the country, ten miles out of town. We had a really long driveway, but about half-way to the end of it, there was a tree. When my sister and I rode our bicycles, which we often did, Mama told us not to go past that tree. She didn’t want us to get too close to the road.

She told us the road was dangerous. There were very few cars that traveled down it. I didn’t really see what the big deal was, but we complied. We probably pedaled a hundred miles during the summer time, up and down that driveway, but we didn’t venture much further than that boundary she had set.

We had a poodle when I was growing up and she had puppies. We were allowed to keep two of them. We loved those little yippee dogs. One morning, before school, one of them didn’t return from their morning bathroom break, when we called for them.

We lived on many acres and it would have been impossible to fence it all. We waited and waited, but Mama said we had to go to school.

When we reached the end of the driveway, the dog had been run over by a car. We were devastated.

It turned out that the road was in fact, a dangerous place. Mama knew things that our little minds couldn’t possibly comprehend. I had a brand new respect for the dangers of the road.

Fast forward some forty years. We are living in the information age. If we don’t know the answer to something, we just Google it. Brand new, infinite knowledge, is always at our fingertips.

It’s easy to start to think that we know everything.

It’s interesting that the one tree in the Garden of Eden that Satan tricked Adam and Even into eating from, was the tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil. Satan wanted them to believe that they could know all that God knows and thus began the fall of man.

When we become Christians and walk with Jesus, we acknowledge that we don’t have all of the answers and we never will on this side of Eternity. How else do we wrap our limited minds around the concept of grace?

We begin to understand that we can’t know what God knows and that wisdom and knowledge are not the same thing.

There are boundaries set for God’s children, just like that tree in my driveway. We sometimes don’t understand them, just like I didn’t understand mine as a child, but God has His reasons, just like Mama had hers. He knows things that our little minds can’t possibly fathom.

Boundaries aren’t meant to hurt or restrict us. They are meant to keep us safe and true wisdom comes from understanding that.

An old tree in a driveway reminded me. Perhaps you needed reminding too.

Have an awesome day!

Wendy 🙂

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